Thursday, August 27, 2009

Irrational Fears

So Cartoon Girl asked me yesterday what were the scariest movies that I had ever watched (that will be a post for another time so be thinking about it) and it got me to thinking about irrational fears. Perhaps a leap on my part but I have been know to "ping-pong". To "ping-pong" in our house is to go from one subject to the next without any kind of connecting point. Despite what HHBL might think I always have a connecting point between my thoughts, they just might be obscure connecting points.

At any rate, in the name of full disclosure and self-humiliation I will tell you some of my irrational fears. We know I am all about self-humiliation like here.

1. I hate, loath, run screaming from the thought of swimming out in the ocean when I can't see what is below me. Even as I wrote that sentence my heart gave a little pitter patter (well that may have been the coffee). We all saw Jaws in the theaters. We know what happens when innocent people go out in the ocean minding their own business and enjoying the day. LUNCH! and it isn't hamburgers. Now, if I am snorkeling that is another matter. I could snorkel all the live long day. I just want to see the Great White coming at me.

2. I can't stand to go barefoot outside. It gives me the heebee geebee willies. In fact, most of the time I don't even go barefoot inside but I am trying to get over that. I went sans foot cover for most of the afternoon and didn't lose what minimal mind marbles I possess. I even enjoyed it, until that is I stepped in a puddle of something wet. Then I went to get my slippers.

3. I must sleep with the covers, or at a bare minimum the sheet, pulled up over my shoulder and neck. It is so that the vampires can't get me......yes, I know there are no vampires. I know that NOW. But when this all started, back when we lived in Indianapolis and I was about 8 and my bed was across the room from the window, the window that the vampires would surely come in to my room from, I couldn't go to sleep unless the sheet was up over my neck. So sue me, it's how I roll.

3. As we all know, when confronted with a plate of liver I gag. However, when confronted with a plate of liverwurst sandwiches with mayo and sweet pickles I drool. Go figure.

4. I can clean up blood and blood products all day long. I have no problem sticking someone with needles. I can clean up poop without blinking an eye (I said poop, I am sorry). But vomit, not so good. I overcame that fairly well when I was working on an oncology unit, it is bad form to be gagging in front of the patients. However, that ability to "rise above" the whole vomit thing seems to have left me. Thank goodness the progeny didn't get the flu too often in their growing up years. And also thank goodness when they did and I had to hold their hair back as they "drove the porcelain bus" they couldn't see me gagging right along with them.

5. Spiders and snakes will make me run screaming into the hills. I can kill a spider if I have to but it takes me a while to work up the nerve.

OK, that is enough self disclosure for the moment. A girl can only divulge so many secrets about herself. And you are going to begin to think I am a mass of quivering anxieties.... which I am not....despite evidence to the contrary. So stop looking at me funny! I am fine, just fine I tell you......


  1. Now that I know all of these deep, dark things about you, I am going to tease you about them. It's revenge for all of those years that you teased me about my phobia of bees and wasps.


    (And stop teasing me, I can't help being scared)

  2. As I have said before.....Bring it on Cartoon Girl!

  3. 1) No so much. But then I don't really swim in the ocean, just float the waves with my feet coming right back down on solid, er, shifting sand.

    2) Barefoot all summer, slippers in winter. Hand knit, felted slippers in winter.

    3)Amen sister. But it's the goblins under the bed that will get you every time.

    2nd 3) Eeeuuuuw!

    4) I pass out when giving or watching someone give blood. Ick to the other two. Could only change my daughters' pooey diapers, but can't do anyone's vomit. Hubster was the go to guy.

    5) As slayer of spiders for my Youngest, I have to ignore the creepy feeling when confronted with a spider. Now snakes, she'll just have to fend for herself.

  4. I loved this post and it totally had me giggling!

    I have too many to list....

  5. I worked at a nursing home years ago and I was the same--cleaned up poop all the time and it didn't bother me. But when it came to cleaning dentures??? OH MY GOSH! YUCK EW GAG!! I can't stand saliva. (Shuddering involuntarily).
    PS The word verification for this comment is "sucki". Just thought I'd share.


Thank you SOOO much for commenting. We bloggers, of which I am such a minnow in such a big pond, live for our comments.