Wednesday, September 2, 2009

What Does An Empty Nest Look Like?

Well, we are empty nesters at last. Now the adjustment begins.

It is funny, I have looked forward to this day, I really have. You see, HHBL and I started having children pretty early in the marriage. Cartoon Girl came along when we had been married about 18 months and she was my second pregnancy. The Engaged One came along 15 months after Cartoon Girl (yes I know that is close, BELIEVE me I know) and then Shoe Queen arrived three years after The Engaged One. By the time my sixth anniversary rolled around we had 3 children under 5. It was a busy household and HHBL and I really had never had a chance to get to know each other as just a married couple, just the two of us. That is just the way that the Lord worked it out and I am not complaining. But now we start out again as just the two of us and I am trying to see what that will look like.

HHBL is my best friend so that is good. It is good to be married to your best friend. Well, I wouldn't want to be married to my best friend from high school because Nancy and I were just so not right for each other and I might still be jealous of her hair. HHBL is much better.

It is just that for so long I have been defined by what I was in relation to my children. I was someone's mom. That was how others saw me, that was how I saw myself. Just because they have all left the house (some more permenantly than others) doesn't mean I stop being a mom but they aren't here on a daily basis and I finally have to decide what I want to be when I grow up.

The possibilities are endless. Just think of it. I could be a belly dancer, I certainly have the belly for it. But I don't think I can make my hips do that "thing" so I guess that is out as a career.

Let's see..... Chief cook and bottle washer? Nope, already done that.

The person who picks up the dead animals on the county roads? I.DON'T.THINK.SO.

That pesky person who answers all the questions on Jeopardy before anyone else. Already do that.

I am going to have to think about this some more I am thinking. I have to figure out what I want to be when I grow up.

Do I have to grow up? I hope not. What a depressing thought.


  1. Debbie, I can so relate to this. We still have one child to go, but I know how quickly the time flies in high school. I started dealing with empty nest syndrome when the first one left, actually. I've been trying to adjust my thinking and emotions ever since. One thing that has helped me is blogging. If nothing else, it connects me with people who say, "You're going through that, too?!"

  2. I always wondered what this would be like. Now you have time to do all those things you always wanted to do but never had the time. You just have to remember what those things were.

    Your blog is very pretty, its all in the header :)

  3. You don't have to grow up! The empty nest thing fascinates me, because I think by the time it happens to me, I'll be too old to enjoy it. Andrew didn't come along until 13 years into our marriage, and I'm pushing 40 now, with him still in preschool. Belly dancing sounds fun, though...I have the belly for it too.

  4. If you don't have to grow up before you have kids in the house, you don't have to grow up after they leave!

    Maybe you could take up target practice. Use an air soft gun or a bb gun... and practice on the deer. :) (It won't kill 'em. It'll just give them a little surprise!)

  5. Nope. Don't grow up. Don't even grow old gracefully. Just play.

  6. I knew that I liked you guys!! And me calling you "guys" is SUCH a midwest thing.

  7. In your newly aquired free time, I believe you should blog more, so I can smile and laugh more. Not to be selfish or anything...


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