Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Cow Butts, Pig Butts and All That Fair Stuff

It's fair time!!! Yes, the thing that we wait eagerly for every year has arrived. It is here!!
I love the fair. For the last 10 years or so we have made it part of our Labor Day weekend to go to the Geauga County Fair. It isn't that the fair changes from year to year because it doesn't. We just love it. I know that the Democratic Party tent is across from the 4H milkshake parlor and the Republican Party tent is on the main thoroughfare. That the man that sells the excellent Strawberry Rhubarb jam is right next to the Republicans and that the guy that sells the beef jerky (I HAVE to figure out how to do that stuff myself) is right inside the door to the exhibit hall underneath the main grand stands. It never changes. But that doesn't mean that we don't love it from year to year. We always go on Monday, we always park in the high school parking lot, we always tour the fair grounds counter clockwise, starting with the agricultural exhibits and ending with the photography exhibit. We are such sticks in the mud.

"Look Mama, it's cow butts".

There I go saying butt. I am sorry. But, be prepared because it is going to happen again, and again, and.......

More cow butts

This is just udderly ridiculous. (I am SO sorry, I just couldn't help myself)

Lady, did you just take a picture of my butt?

And one more just for the heck of it. I am done with cow butts now....but you never know what other butts are going to show up.

Do not be fooled! These red eyed bunnies are the scariest things in the world. They just sit there all cute but really they are something out of a bad 1950's horror movie, their eyes glowing red in the darkness, planning to take over the world.

Oh my word that is a bunny butt! How did that get in here?? Again, I said the word butt and I am sorry for that but it just sort of slipped out.

Then it was on to the Poultry barn with is HHBL's favorite. He likes to wander the aisles and see if he can get the roosters to crow. He is pretty good at it if I do say so myself.
Well, what is this little thing sitting in the bottom of the cage all glistening and wet. Yes, it was wet like it had just come out of the chicken. I am not sure that I need to get that up close and personal with the place where my omelet comes from.

Lady get away from my egg!

Doesn't this chicken look mean! I am thinking that this chicken is destined for chicken tenders or perhaps a good hearty soup.

And then we had to go out and look at the turkeys that are kept in the outside pens because...these things are huge....and really, really ugly.

Oh I am SO sorry Mr. Turkey for this horrible wattle that you have hanging down from your ugly face. It is OK though because, you see, after the end of November you really won't have to worry about it anymore. Have you ever heard of the holiday called Thanksgiving? It is going to solve ALL of your problems.

Well how rude! After I just mentioned that Thanksgiving thing the turkey walked off in a huff and showed me his really ugly, gnarly turkey butt. Fine! I have one word for you Mr. Turkey....Gravy!

Look! It's Sir Lambsalot
(I just crack myself up sometimes)

Since it was around lunch time all the pigs were sleeping peacefully in their pens. I love how the pigs tail is sticking out of the pen. Which part of the pig is the bacon? I am just wondering? Ummmmmmm, ham. Just as an "aside", notice that I refrained from saying the b--- word. I can show some restraint occasionally.

Lady get away from me and stop talking about my ham and bacon parts!

Look, a demented goat!

And after we had toured every one of the animal barns it was on to the food!

I just haven't subjected you to all the pictures. You should be very grateful. There were a lot more pictures of animals and their posteriors.

We started off with our usual order of onion rings. Oh can't you see them and smell them in all their lovely, deep fried goodness
Cartoon Girl and HHBL drooling

We split the order if you really have to know. Eating a whole order yourself would surely put you into a deep fried coma.

Then it was on to find someone to sell us some lovely gyros. It isn't as good as the gyros at Papa's Deli but I didn't have any trouble finishing the thing in an embarrassingly short period of time. AND I didn't spill much of it on myself. I was so proud.

After sitting for a bit to let the gyros sort of settle and find room, it was off to get our awesome 4H milkshakes. Those lovely cool yummy cups of goodness that we........
What. WHAT!!!! How can they be sold out? They sit right across the thoroughfare from the dairy barn for the love of Pete and I know that there are lots of cows in there that have milk just waiting to be used. I took pictures of them. No. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

So, we had to content ourselves with apple fritters, made for us personally by the one eyed fry cook at the apple fritter stand. You just have to love rural America. And they were really good let me tell you.

And then we went home because we had seen everything, we had eaten everything and we were teetering on the verge of an deep fried food crisis.

I can't wait for next year to do it all over again!


  1. Where do I start?! You know I love animal butt pictures. I don't think I've ever seen a turkey up close before... because I would've remembered the ugliness! Those fritters look awesome and the one-eyed fry guy cracked me up. And fair gyros are my favorite! Love taking a look at your fair

  2. Those onion rings made my stomach growl. So I just scrolled back up and looked at the nasty turkey and that took care of that!

  3. My family have to go to the Geagua Fair next year. The Randolph Fair is a nice medium-sized one, but it doesn't have quite the selection of deep-fried foods that yours did. (Of course, we'll probably live a day or two longer than you guys.)

    But man, those apple fritters sure looked good!!

  4. Lookleap we will guide you to the fair and help you find those lovely fried foods and then you will not live any longer than we will. But we will have enjoyed ourselves immensely.

  5. I didn't get to the fair this year so I really enjoyed living it through your fantastic photos! You are so funny--you crack me up! Loved the demented goat. And the cute bunny. Reminds me of a favorite childhood book: Bunnicula. Remember that one?

  6. I once said something about Thanksgiving to a wild turkey...and he literally started yelling at me...talking back all, "only if you catch me and I don't peck out your eyes" we have it all film...


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