Yeah, like I am a real writer or something! Yes, but I play one on the blogosphere. And this blogger is fighting with a bit of writers block.
It isn’t like I don’t have a whole bunch of blog posts that I am working on. They are circling around like planes at O’Hare Airport on a busy day. They are sitting there in the Open Drafts portion of LiveWriter, just staring at me, telling me to finish them for the love of Pete! It is just that I can’t seem to polish any of them to my satisfaction.
I am uninspired……
I am blocked……..
I am stumped…….
A whiney, crying baby. But I will get over it and persevere and be witty and erudite (I LOVE that word).
Maybe I will tell you about my encounter with the nice police man yesterday. You know the one where I was toodling along after my walk with “the girls” and I was about 5 things deep into thinking about my day. I was 3 minutes from home and I looked into my rear view mirror to see flashing lights and…..
Oh please, oh please let him be speeding up to me because he is off to police some horrible domestic dispute somewhere else in our fair town.
I pull over to the side, hopinghopinghoping that he will then zoom past me…..Come on, zoom past me.
RATS! He pulls up behind me. And of course this is on the main road just outside my development and it is just about 8a when anyone whom I might know are going to work. THANK GOODNESS it was MLK day which means that people like LookLeap were not taking daughter Jenna to school. Of course, now LookLeap will know what happened but she won’t have actually SEEN my humiliation. Thank goodness for small favors.
I was NOT going to employ the often used and always noxious method of tears so I just got out my license and insurance card and stood (or sat) at the ready. He was out of the car slowly, as if to let me sweat, and then there he was not right at the window but leaning in from the back because, you know, I look like someone who might be dangerous. Um hm, I have unwashed hair in a pony tail, my workout clothes on and I haven’t showered. Come to think of it that might be really scary.
Smile sweetly and say “Good Morning!” Hand him my info.
“Ma’am (ma’am??), I clocked you going 47mph back there.”
“ Yes, Officer (small laugh). I was thinking about my day and wasn’t paying attention.” Smile again.
“I will be back in just a moment ma’am.” No smile.
I really wanted to say “quit with the ma’am business buddy!” but he had my driver’s license and a large gun on his hip so I just sat there and hoped that no one that I knew drove by.
Just as an aside, that is what happened the last time I got a speeding ticket. I was on the way to work at my daughter’s school and got stopped at just about the busiest place on that road. And of course all I heard the rest of the day was, “Hey, that looked like you getting a ticket this morning. Was that you?”
“Yes it was, now go away!”
OK, now back to our exciting story. Even though I am sure that it wasn’t a long time that I was sitting there it just seemed long. You know the routine (or at least you do if you are a breaker of the law like I seem to be.) The officer goes back to his car to make sure that you aren’t a terrorist on the lam and you sit there and try to look busy and not look around. I did spend the time sending a “tweet” or two and a txt or two. You don’t want to spend too much time looking at your side mirror to see if he is done.
Finally! here he comes. Again he stops just a bit back from the window and says the words that I am HOPING to here.
“I am just going to give you a warning this time but please be aware of your speed next time. Sign here ma’am and note your phone number.”
“Oh I will be careful next time Officer. And thank you for stopping me (choke, choke).”
I really did thank him for stopping me. I am such a suck up. I pull out into traffic and skulk home, going 5 miles under the speed limit until I can make the turn onto my street.
And then I sped up and went to fast……
Just because I could. PFFFFFFFFT!
The last time I got stopped by the police, he had me pull into my daughter's school's parking lot. I could have killed him! (Of course, then I don't think I would have gotten the warning that I did.)ReplyDelete
I lol'ed a lot at this particular blog for some reason. (How he refused to smile, your suck-upishness, speeding up on our street.) You crack me up.
So don't go worrying so much about writer's block!!
You rule breaker! You criminal! I always get nervous when I get pulled over... not that it happens all the time. The last time it was because I had my brights on and didn't know how to turn them off. I'm a dork and I had just gotten my car.ReplyDelete
Haha!! You rebel! This made me laugh. Hope the writer's block ends soon. A glass of red wine might be a good muse. :o)ReplyDelete