Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Advice for Young Folks Getting Married

First of all I can’t believe that I just used the phrase “young folks”. I am just astonished. I can hear my Grandma Pringle’s voice in my head.
Oh, so what I wanted to say very quickly is……..
If you are getting married.
And you are registering for all that stuff that you hope that people will give you.
Don’t be fooled. Don’t be distracted. Don’t be dazzled by all the glitter of things like crystal goblets and fancy china and “goldware” or “sterling silver”. Don’t do it!!
Don’t get sucked in.
Register for things that you know you are going to use on a daily or regular basis. Go for the appliances and the good pots and pans. The regular dishes and silverware. Sturdy but cute glasses.
Don’t ask for crystal or good china. You will not use it unless you plan on entertaining the President of France or something.
I know because I HAVE all of that stuff. I have crystal goblets in various sizes. I have enough good china to feed 18 people. I have cut glass bowls out the wazoo. I have gold flatware, a TOTALLY impractical thing because it has to be washed by hand. I have some silver serving pieces and pitchers and stuff like that.
And I can count on two hands the number of times in the last 25 years that I have used some of that stuff. That is not good. It isn’t that I don’t like the stuff it is just that there is more of it than we need really. But I am determined that we will be using the “good dishes” more often.
I am a whining, complaining baby I know. You don’t have to remind me. I am aware of my failing in the gratitude department. I hang my head in shame. But I am now having to pack all this stuff up again and take it to a new place. And it just urkes me that I am again packing up things that I don’t use but that are too good to give to Volunteers of America.
I would have saved myself a bunch of headaches if I had just registered for Le Cruset instead of Waterford.
I could really use the Le Cruset.


  1. I hear that! We have sold many wedding gifted crystal vases and bowls over the course of the last 18 years at yard sales. We have used the proceeds to purchase useful household items like crockpots, toaster ovens and blenders.

  2. Amen! I never registered for china at all when we got married, and I'm so glad I didn't! We use Corelle plates that I bought by the set in a big box, and I'm perfectly happy with those. I do, however, have a bunch of my grandmother's stuff like that that we inherited when we bought the house---punch bowls and adorable little punch cups. It's nice, but it's clutter, and it's ignored.

  3. Couldn't agree more. I did not register for china and my grandmother almost had a fit! It's just not practical. I got my regular dishes and then I registered for a very cheap set of neutral colored dishes. They can be dressed up if needed. (Almost 3 years into it, we've never dressed them up!)

  4. Okay, I'm going to have to disagree here (and I realize I'm in the minority). I registered for 12 china settings, stemware and flatware (though not sterling) ... and never regretted it. You see, every Sunday I try to have our family dinners in the dining room where I get out all this stuff, fold the cloth napkins, and fix a special meal. I will admit that I do regularly fall in and out of this habit, but it's one I strive to meet.

    As a plug to Lenox, their stuff is indestructible (and I can tell you about a fall down the basement steps to prove it), so I always felt pretty secure using it even when the girls were young (though I did hold back on the good water goblets for a number of years.)

    If you doubt any of this, all you'd have to see are the stained upholstered chairs and well-worn tabletop.

    Why only treat company to the good stuff when in fact our families are far more important to us??

  5. Get the cheap stuff. What you like at 20 isn't the same thing you like or need at 35, and certainly isn't the thing you want at 50. Buy things you can happily and guiltlessly give away when you reach turning points in your life. Do not hoard. Do not covet. Be practical.
    And for goodness sake, don't have a big wedding...have a long happy marriage instead with the money you would have wasted on a wedding in the bank there when (God forbid) you need it.

  6. Excellent and sound advice! I'm donating boxes of stuff to the hospital thrift shop almost weekly in my last year's effort to de-stuff the house. I've gotten past the pain of "this, too, must go!"


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