Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Parenting

I just have to say that sometimes parenting is easy and sometimes it is hard. I am sure that you know that if you have kids. When my munchkins were little parenting was often hard in a physical sense. I was tired. There was a time when I had three children under the age of 5. Like I said, I was tired.

Then as children grow you move from physical tiredness and drain to emotional. Yup, it isn't physically draining any longer to be a parent, it is emotionally draining. I should clarify that in this particular instance that we are dealing with I am agitated because I want to defend my child from something that has hurt her greatly. But.......I can't just jump in any longer and fix the situation. She is old enough that she can deal with this situation on her own, even though "her heart has been stomped on". It isn't appropriate for parents, after their kids are a certain age, to just jump in and fight the battles for them even though that is our natural inclination. That is hard to remember when you child has been hurt. So very hard to remember and to abide by.

I am trying, I really am. But I have to tell you that when one of my munchkins is hurt then I want to deal with it. But.....I am dealing with it in other ways. I am talking to myself a lot, having imaginary conversations with certain people and triumphing over them utterly. If you were to come to my house and observe me I am sure that you would be calling the white truck to take me away, I am talking to myself so much. I am trying to channel my energy into my workouts, to "work my mad out" so to speak. And, I am asking the Lord that my heart will be right in this situation, that I will not hold onto this anger that I feel and that I will say and do the right thing when I encounter this person in daily life (and I will encounter this person I assure you). Praying that my munchkin will find a way to deal with this situation that will bring her joy and will not have her loose all the happiness that she has felt participating in this particular activity for the last 6 years.

Don't you just hate that I am writing all this in that euphemistic style that just doesn't give you all the juice details. Sorry, details are changed (or in this instance not supplied) to protect the innocent. You will just have to live with it.

Like I said, it is hard parenting sometimes.

3 comments:

  1. I'm sorry that [whatever happened] happened. So far my kids are pretty little, but my firstborn is starting to become her own little person, and I don't know what I'll do if - no, when - I have to step back and let her deal with things on her own.

    I like your description of your "imaginary conversations," though. I'm great at that. Sometimes my scenarios (that's what I call them) keep me up for hours, until I have to tell myself, "You're not really talking to these people; they can't hear you for real! Get some sleep!"

    I feel for you. And your daughter.

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  2. Love you, Mom :D I know that it couldn't have been easy raising us, but I think that you did a great job.

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  3. Thank you favorite oldest daughter.

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