I Love Therefore I Steal

I am beat.

I am bushed.

I have Ornament Exchange hangover. And there wasn’t even any alcohol involved.

But by golly I had fun last night.

Oh the possibilities this pile of ornaments represents. The joys. The sorrows. The gasps. The groans.

The stealing.

But first we had to eat.

The same thing happens every year. I plan food. And people bring more food. And there is so much good food.  And DESSERTS!!!! And when I look at all the food arrayed on the island I think,

We are NEVER going to eat a tenth of this.

But we manage it. Oh yes we do.

And then, once I can make myself heard over the earth shattering din gentle murmur of voices we move chairs into the Family Room and the happy joy of stealing begins.

The rules are as follows, in case you didn’t know.

1. #1 picks a gift and unwraps. We ohhhhh and ahhhhh
2. #2 can either unwrap a gift OR she can steal #1’s gift and #1 then unwraps another. Etc, etc, etc through all the numbers.
3. No ornament can be stolen more than twice.
4. You man not steal back an ornament that has been stolen from you.
5. There will be NO colluding between participants (this is the Hope and Heather rule).
6. All wrapping goes with the ornament if it is stolen.
7. You may not steal your own ornament. If you liked it so much when you bought it you should have purchased two.
8. Do NOT get attached to your ornament until the end of the “exchange”.
9. #1 ends the exchange when she either decides that she likes her ornament OR swaps with someone else cuz she is the only one who didn’t have the chance to steal.

My word I am tired just writing those out. We always go over the rules and this was important last night as we had three “newbies”.

These women have always SEEMED so nice and kind!

Cute frog! Anne didn’t own it for very long I am afraid.

And Anita starts the insanity by stealing the frog from Anne.

And then Kim steals the frog from Anita.

Kathleen started off with these…..but they were soon gone.

Then there was the cute green elf….. which was stolen by Heather, an ornament thief of some renown.

Oh sure, it looks like we are all admiring the ornament. But really everyone is assessing where they are in the number line and if they can manage to steal that ornament for the second time. It was really a cute ornament. And Sandy did not manage to keep it.

Cough those ornaments up Carolyn!

Mine, all mine.

Who wouldn’t like a line of Reindeer Rockettes.

Enjoy that ornament Lin.

But not for long. Did you think I wasn’t fully willing to participate in the stealing free exchange of ornaments?

Puhleeeeze!

Poor Mary Mac. Even though she didn’t set the record for the most ornaments stolen (that would be Cheryl who had 5 different ornaments appropriated) she had several very cute ones reassigned. I believe that she is asking for visitation rights.

Hope does not look all that remorseful at the ornament agony Mary is experiencing.

And finally it was all done. All the ornaments unwrapped and redistributed.

I tell you, my stomach hurt from all the laughter. And the good friendship. And the fun. And the food.

It may take me a year to recover.